Congrats! You killed my clones!


Holy sarding zute, you did it. You did it!!!

And by “you,” I mean “we.” I mean, you did all the work, but I pointed you in the right direction to begin with, so I’m going to claim some of the credit.

You might be wondering – what exactly did we do? Not to make a big deal of it, but we just managed to save the sarding universe is all.


See, that’s the thing about the universe: there sure is a lot of it. Just when you think you’ve saved all the universe there is to save, you turn a corner and there’s another part no one knew about in peril. And when multiple timelines start getting involved, it just gets worse.

So you might be thinking “Okay, so we only saved part of the universe. Since it’s the part we live in, isn’t that good enough?”

But saving part of the universe just isn’t good enough. Even saving most of the universe won’t work. 𝕃𝔼𝕋 𝕄𝔼 𝔼𝕏ℙ𝕃𝔸𝕀ℕ:

Pretend that the universe is an infinitely-large barrel (have you invented those yet? If not, it might be a good idea to start heavily investing in cooperage.) and each timeline is an apple. There’s a lot of parallels between the two, actually. They’re both reddish, go bad easily, and often contain wormholes.

So even if we’d saved all but one timeline, the collapse of that last one would start to spread, like a bad apple contaminating the others. Pretty soon, you’re back where you started, and you need to save the entire universe all over again.

𝕐𝔼𝔸ℍ. It’s a lot of work. But you know what they say: a stitch in time saves nine hundred and ninety-nine trillion, nine hundred and ninety-nine billion, nine hundred and ninety-nine million, nine hundred and ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred ninety-nine timelines.

If we can save the whole universe now, we’re going to save a whole bunch of time later. Uh, 𝕃𝕀𝕋𝔼ℝ𝔸𝕃𝕃𝕐.

So, we’ve saved one timeline. That’s the first step. The second step is to order the third step, and then – if you’re as smart as you’ve been so far – that will let us save rest.

𝔻𝕆ℕ'𝕋 ℍ𝔼𝕊𝕀𝕋𝔸𝕋𝔼. The universe is counting on you. (And just as a reminder, that’s where all the dogs live. If you don’t do it for me, do it for the puppers.)


As a thank you for your valiant efforts to decode all those messages lost across Spacetime, get 10% off your pre-order of That Time You Killed Me when you use coupon code CLONES.